GAZETTE Tampa Bay Gay and Lesbian News

By Brian Feist
I just returned from a trip back to the family farm in Minnesota, where my brothers and their wives and I threw a party for my parents' 50th Wedding Anniversary. We all had a good time, which kind of took me by surprise, as my father and I have not been seeing eye to eye on a few things lately (he thinks George W. Bush walks on water, whereas I think he should be drowned) and one of us is as stubborn as the other in defending our positions.

Celebrating a 50th wedding anniversary is no mean feat, these days. Sure, my parents have had their share of conflict in their marriage, but they persevered and have stuck with one another through it all, and I admire them for it. They not only taught us to honor our commitments-they lived it.

From where my family lives it's a two-hour drive to the airport, and my brother provided the ride both ways, giving us lots of time to talk about lots of things, not the least of which was the same-sex marriage issue. He said he didn't have any issue with two people of the same sex having the legal benefits of marriage, but just didn't see why it had to be called "marriage." I went through the rhetoric about domestic partners and civil unions and how many rights, privileges and responsibilities go with them-and how "separate but equal" has never worked. I also explained why calling it anything other than marriage isn't enough. I think I said something like, calling it something else is like saying "You can have all of the legal rights of marriage, but you can't call it 'marriage,' because 'marriage' is 'special' and even with all of the rights, your relationship isn't 'special' like ours." I don't know if I changed his mind about same-sex marriage, but he did say he understood it better.

I wish I had told him about my friend Kim. You know Kim-Kim Ann Callan, Executive Director of Crescendo, staff writer for the Gazette. Even if you don't know her personally, you've probably seen her tooling around in her wheelchair-an almost constant accessory since she broke her ankle more than a year and a half ago.

I got home to find a tearful message from Kim.

Life hasn't been easy for Kim since she broke her ankle. The whole saga is worthy of an exposé on the utter failure of the American healthcare system-or at least Hillsborough County's: an uninsured patient, a greedy hospital putting money ahead of patient care, uninterested and unsympathetic (or incompetent) case workers dragging their feet on getting referrals, and so on.

The fall that broke her ankle seems to have been the first misstep into a downward spiral that has left Kim's very life in jeopardy.

Since she had no insurance, St. Joseph's Hospital wouldn't operate on Kim's shattered ankle, only splinting it and sending her home, leaving her on her own to arrange funding and find a surgeon who would operate. That took six weeks-enough time for the displaced bone fragments to begin fusing together. By the time she had basic funding, through Hillsborough County, and a surgeon lined up, the ankle had to be re-broken to be set properly. To add insult to injury, Kim suffered a heart attack in the recovery room following surgery.

Kim's diabetes complicated the healing process, making multiple surgeries necessary, and an antibiotic-resistant infection corroded the bones and nearly required amputation after the removal of the metal hardware that was stablizing her ankle. The latest word from her surgeon is that it is unlikely that her ankle will ever heal properly, leaving her permanently disabled.

An infection can cause a diabetic person's blood sugar to become erratic, and Kim was no exception. Not only did the infection complicate the healing of her ankle, but her blood sugar levels skyrocketed. Elevated blood sugar levels weakened the capillaries in her eyes, causing a hemorrhage and near total blindness in one-requiring another surgery and specialist, not covered under the Hillsborough County Health Plan.

By now you're probably wondering, "My God! How much can one person take?!" Sadly, there is more. A suspicious mole on her chest led Kim to ask her case manager for a dermatology referral. It took nearly three months before approval was granted, and Kim's fears were confirmed: it was "malignant" melanoma-one of the most virulent and rapidly growing cancers-and it had already started to spread to her lymph nodes.
Kim has sold her home and most of her possessions to try to pay for her cancer treatment, but is still far short of what she needs. Her partner, Sherry Trunzo, has stood by her through it all and her friends have all pitched in to help wherever necessary, and are raising what funds they can to help. Kim says it is a humiliating and humbling position, yet she realizes the support and love she has received is a very special gift. Kim sounded defeated when she left her message on my machine: "Tell people they have to get out and vote. If we could get married, I'd have insurance. Don't let this happen to anyone else."

Please consider helping Kim in this difficult time. Donations can be sent to Kim Ann Callan, c/o the Gazette. P.O. Box 11987, St. Petersburg, FL 33733. And whatever you do, don't forget to vote on November 2.

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